I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
