I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
