I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
