New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
