just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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