She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Randomize
