I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
of course. lets lasso hookers.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
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