i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
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