your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
