I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Randomize
