You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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