what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
You need a sexual gate keeper
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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