I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
