Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Randomize
