This girl is more easily done than said...
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
