i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
