return my video game
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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