i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
accomplished twins. life is a go
He had one of those small greek statue penises
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
