I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I think I just shit out all my problems.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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