So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
time to smoke my breakfast
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
