did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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