I want to stick my p in your. b.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize