let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
