Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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