whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
