We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
