Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
