Only a mothe r could love this liver
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Randomize
