i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Randomize
