I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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