I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Only a mothe r could love this liver
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
