Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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