Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
