I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
