somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
