dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
