Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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