There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
It all started with a game of naked twister.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
