He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize