Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
he wants to bone in the snuggie
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
