If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Its about making memories worth repressing
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
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