i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
