She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
