Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
