You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Randomize
