When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize