Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
