Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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