Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
