I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
May the power of my ass compel you!!
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Randomize
