Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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